Luke O'Neil is that dude you can most definitely trust to call bullshit on just about anything: SXSW, St. Patrick's Day, anything. When it comes to craft cocktails and bars in general, this is always what you want--yes, a modicum of interest and general knowledge about what you're drinking is a plus, but at the end of the day, it's all booze, so don't be an asshole about it. Since he's got this strangely genius palate paired with an acid wit, we will absolutely follow him into the murky underworld of mixology, every time.

A newly appointed chairman of the Federal Communications Commission (FCC), the nation's most important media regulator, appears before a confab of television big wigs and reads the assembly the riot act.

The chairman opens by making it clear that he is not impressed with television programming, which in the course of his speech he characterizes as "a vast wasteland".

^TKTKTKTKT

When NBC announced that it had picked up The Playboy Club pilot, the decision was controversial, to say the least. Former undercover Bunny Gloria Steinem called for a boycott, and an NBC affiliate in Salt Lake opted not to air the new program. Empowering, it will not be. The network has received considerable flack from family-values conservatives and feminist liberals for its gross glorification of hypersexuality and hypersexism.

The Village Voice has helpfully obtained and annotated a copy of the contract that MTV's Real World contestants must sign -- it starts with signing your life away, and then gets crazier from there. According to the Voice:

"Under the stipulations of the following standard contract, participants in Real World--the grandaddy of "reality" shows, after Cops--agree to the following terms:

It's that time again, folks -- time to google at the absurd outfits, kvetch about the pandering film nominees, root for our favorite cinematic underdogs, and otherwise revel in the absurd hoopla that is Oscar Night.

We had a blast with our live Oscar chatjam last year, and so we're doing it again. Starting at 7pm, we'll be snarking our way up the red carpet.

Eight episodes in to the sixth installment of the Housewives franchise, The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Bravo viewers have already been firmly introduced to some of the most deranged characters to ever come out of Andy Cohen's nuthouse. Just like with that grisly, five-car pileup on the side of the highway, it is impossible to turn away.

Watching Law & Order UK is like walking into a hole-in-the-wall restaurant that you heartily praise before realizing that it's part of a chain. But that doesn't undermine its quality (completely), right? Anyway, Law & Order UK is already in its 3rd season across the pond, and even though it started airing on BBC America only a few weeks ago, a review is a bit tardy, no? Here instead are a few reasons why the Brit show manages to be more successful (you know, in terms of content, not longevity, money earned, or other series spawned, like the one here) than the one we stuck with for 18 seasons (though seriously, cancellation? Fo' real NBC, girl still had a few more gos in her, at least).

We regret to inform you of the loss of this week's Mad Men chatjam. We did everything we could to save it -- we even pretended to fly to North Carolina, but to no avail. But we will return next week, make no mistake. We're going to push ourselves, and it will be exhilarating. (Only two episodes left, folks!)

See you all next Monday.

Step right up, folks, and get in on our live discussion of recent developments in the world of television! With the fall season premiering this week, we thought we'd try something a bit different - instead of limiting our discussion exclusively to Mad Men, we're opening it up to happenings on any show. Stop by and let us know your thoughts on the premiere of Boardwalk Empire, or last week's It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, or this week's debuts (including Lone Star, Running Wilde, S#*! My Dad Says, Hawaii Five-0, Detroit 1-8-7) and returns (such as Community, How I Met Your Mother, Glee, Modern Family, House, The Office, and 30 Rock.)

Or, we'll just talk about old episodes of The West Wing. We're easygoing.