The Phoenix Network:
 
 
 
About  |  Advertise
Adult  |  Moonsigns  |  Band Guide  |  Blogs  |  In Pictures
 

Ten new careers for Bill Gates

Xperience
By MIKE MILIARD  |  January 9, 2008

080111_gates_main
What [attendees of the International Consumer Electronics Show] might not have expected — and what they clearly relished — was a self-deprecating farewell video in which [Bill] Gates mocked the idea that he would desperately cast about for things to do after retiring as Microsoft’s chief software architect this July.

It showed a giddy Gates rapping, trying to lift weights, pleading for a spot in U2, and lobbying for a place on a presidential ticket. The video’s cameo appearances from the likes of Brian Williams, Jay-Z, Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, Al Gore, Jon Stewart, Steven Spielberg, and George Clooney provoked uproarious laughter — not a common occurrence at a tech conference. Associated Press

Should any of those jobs fall through, here are some others Mr. Gates could pursue.

• Britney babydaddy.
• The “I’m a PC” guy in those Mac commercials.
• Roadside squeegee man. (He’s got lots of experience removing bugs from Windows.)
• Voice of Kermit the Frog.
• President of Pakistan. (Maybe the restrictive lockdown technology used for the Zune’s digital-rights management could keep those nukes safe?)
• A Silvan Elf of Mirkwood in Peter Jackson’s new Hobbit movie.
• Best. Desktop support geek. Ever.
• Professional Evil Genius. (Wait, scratch that. He’s been doing that for the past 30 years.)
• Supercuts spokesmodel.
• The guy’s worth $56 billion. He can probably afford to coast for a while.

  Topics: Lifestyle Features , Barack Obama, Elections and Voting, Politics,  More more >
| More

[ 05/25 ]   "2012 BFA Thesis Exhibition," mixed media student exhibition  @ Maine College of Art
[ 05/25 ]   Amy Allen  @ Empire Dine And Dance
[ 05/25 ]   Confusatron: "Return of the Jedi"  @ Geno's
ARTICLES BY MIKE MILIARD
Share this entry with Delicious
  •   INTERVIEW: AZIZ ANSARI IS ON THE FLY  |  May 09, 2012
    It's been a good few months for Aziz Ansari.
  •   GADGETS FOR BOTH SIDES OF THE OCCUPY DIVIDE  |  December 06, 2011
    Is Santa a one-percenter? Sometimes it seems that way.
  •   INSIDE THE TEDXDIRIGO CONFERENCE  |  September 14, 2011
    I arrived at TEDxDirigo on September 10 feeling rather less than confident about the state of world. The tenth anniversary of 9/11 — and the awful decade that unspooled from that sky-blue morning — was on my mind.
  •   THE WORLD IS WATCHING  |  September 27, 2010
    And so far no one knows what to do about it.
  •   INTERVIEW: DANIEL CLOWES  |  April 27, 2010
    "If you had told me then that there would be cute girls coming to comic conventions in 15 years, I would’ve told you you were out of your mind."

 See all articles by: MIKE MILIARD



  |  Sign In  |  Register
 
thePhoenix.com:
Phoenix Media/Communications Group:
TODAY'S FEATURED ADVERTISERS
Copyright © 2012 The Phoenix Media/Communications Group